Two weddings, five-weeks apart. Mountaintop moments galore as my summer fills with parties, the gathering of family and friends, travel, and fancy clothes – all to celebrate the marriage of our two children. My mind revisits all the details, and I try to recall every minute of those life-changing days.
But whether it’s celebration or loss, replaying the details over and over in your mind, is part of the process. Details are foggy at times, yet others bring razor-sharp clarity.
I think back to the days soon after my first husband’s death and I know they were my darkest days so far. I ask myself, “But when did I start to see the gifts? How long did it take before I could remember the mountain-top moments within my grief?” Now (26 1/2 years later) I see that they did exist!
The unexpected presence of a friend allowing me to cry on her shoulder, or a warm meal shared. The porch light left on next door, the toy given to my young son at his father’s funeral, the donation made to the zoo to support my husband’s favorite animal. The notification that my husband’s organs gave the gift of life to three people on Valentine’s Day.
Those may not seem like mountain-top moments to you, but looking back they are just that – moments that took my breathe away, moments that touched my heart in a profound way.
Sometimes just looking up and out brings the gift of healing.
So, if your view is blocked by the shadow of the mountain right now, bring your gaze up – take a deep breath and give yourself time. Slowly but surely, you might see with new eyes!